post Christmas

Again, this was the worst/best Christmas.

First my co-workers are and were being a major butt. I have no idea what I have done or will do to them. They just started making stuff up and then started expecting me to sit and take a tongue lashing when I did nothing wrong. HMMMM no.

One of my clients came in and she was sick with Bronchitis. Now my whole family has a cold. I am pumping all three kids full of vitamins and benedryl. The baby got the worst of it. She's miserable. poor thing.

Then my family, being my normal family, was highly dysfunctional once again. What's sad is that I have always joked that we three kids had our own parent. But Daryl is the only one that has a parent left since my mother is the only one still alive. But she seems to be treating Doug pretty well lately too. They all fight like cats and dogs, but My mom will bend over backwards for them and somehow I am the only one left out in the cold. I have tried repeatedly to not have a huge pity party. But to no avail I think, as my heart breaks, I am officially done with my family. My oldest bro is eating himself into a grave. My middle bro is a mooch and sleeps all day, not to mention a horrible father. My oldest niece is two inches away from being married with a kid and her 17th birthday isn't til march. She also considers herself a wetback.:( I don't like racism. If you want to be proud of who you are fine. But don't call yourself names. Not to mention we are as white as they come......BriAnn then decides it will be awesome to bully I'liea all day on Christmas and tell her mother that she's fat. SPECTACULAR! And since I was stunned at Bri I took up for I'Liea and got myself griped out by Daryl, while he was laying in bed at 1 p.m. no less. Then my mom came to Daryl's rescue and backed him up! Then while taking my dishes home from moms, I went to get the only thing my husband asked me to make, which he had two bites of, and it was pretty much gone. The trash compactor, whose supposed to be my brother, eats everything in site. I know he knows better and I think he says darn the consequences, I want it so I will eat it and take the heat. He even ate my husbands birthday dinner this year that had his name on it. Also, like every holiday my Aunt Dorothy picks a person to annoy. Thanksgiving was I'Liea. Then Christmas was my husband. Good bye family.

The best part was seeing all three kids faces when they got their presents. Donnie's favorite part was singing happy birthday to Jesus. We had muffins with candles in them. He keeps bringing me the candles wanting to sing it again! My children are my life. I love them dearly. They keep me sane. Thankyou God for allowing me to be a mother. It's a job I don't take lightly. And I swear to TRY to never treat one better than the other.

Christmas 2011

I feel like I should be writing this Sunday night.

Well it's one of the worst but best Christmas' I've ever had. My co-workers are being really weird and I have no earthly idea why. And on the other hand Donnie is two and it's exciting to view Christmas through his eyes. I wonder what God's plans for me are. Because I can't deal with the co-workers anymore.

Christmas

First christmas in YEARS that I am actually looking forward to and it seems Satan and the world are out to make sure it sucks. Truck breaks down, co-worker goes crazy on me, and I fight with the hubby non-stop.:( Well that's three things. So can the madness stop now? PLEASE?

Your own worst enemy

So this week has been terrible for Donovan. Poor guys head looks like he's been in a fight. He's enjoying all the attention. And he's been acting better because of it. So go figure.

I will be doing/leading bible study with the homeless in a few weeks. And I narrowed it down to being grateful and happy with what you have.

Going through a lot in the home front. So many voices in my head. Hopefully God will lead my head above water again.

No sleep for the wicked

So it's raining. Which means I got no sleep. My hands hurt really bad. I got my grandmothers arthritis. So not cool. about to be 36 with old lady hands. I love my job too. I hope I can keep doing it til we move and then look into opening my own coffee shop. OOOO that makes me smile.

Marriage?

So my husband is a big man child. And I hate video games and he needs to learn how to be a father.:( So this is telling to much info but I can't take his mood swings anymore. GROW UP BRANDON!

Chilren and exercise

So, I try to give myself a break and take my kids to my mom so I can go to work once or twice a week with out kids in tow. Well my mom decided to start using the wooden spoon on my son.:( He woke up screaming twice last night. If my husband finds out he will have a heart attack. So now I have a huge guilty conscience. I think they won't be going over there any time soon.

Before zumba I went and got a protein bar. It tasted funny, but they all do and I thought nothing of it. Well at the end of the night I spent the evening up-chucking anything that was in my tummy.:( Not a stellar day. Today will be better.

Starting the day off with scripture and a prayer. If anyone is reading these....How do you start your day?

Body

Well I have been dieting and exercising since July. 20 lbs lighter and and about 5 sizes smaller. It's an awesome feeling. I am so glad that I am able to keep it up this time around. And I didn't gain anything over thanksgiving. However over thanksgiving I made sugar free food and ate too much of it. My friend Kelley had told me the dangers of fake sugar and now I have these weird pains. I am in fear that it's another kidney infection. So I downed most of a 64oz. bottle of cranberry juice and a ton of water. I am peeing a lot in hopes to stave off any infection. If I don't feel better tomorrow I will call the doctor.
It's real neat to see a smaller me. I often wonder how I had gotten so big. And how after having two children I was able to get some of it off when I couldn't before. I truly miss hiking. I used to hike two to three times a week. Now it's never. I will have to get back to Austin and do it again. Even if I'm alone.

Life in General

So I have clogged ears because I have yeast in them! LONG story. And my body is sore. My stomach is mad about thanksgiving. I have been on a diet since july and eating bad made my tummy retaliate. My son now gets up at 6:30 every since the time change.:( I am going crazy. He's either teething or terrible two's. I want to cut my hair off because it gets everywhere and Donnie picks it up and tries to eat it.:( Can I please have a vacation? Lord please? Please? Please?

Cold out

Well it got to 32 degrees last night so I didn't take the kids out in it to go to church. SO we have been enjoying a day at home. Currently I am trying to get the kids to take a nap. The concept of SHHHH Lilah is already asleep alludes Donnie. I have so much in my head that I want to accomplish today. I would really like to get outside and get some yard work done. Who's gonna watch the kids! NOBODY! Teach me to have kids late in life so no one can help out. If I hadn't stayed with DUANE SO LONG I might have already had my kids in high school like normal people! And I could go outside and play because my kids wouldn't want to be around me through their teenage years.........oh well. Maybe if they fall asleep I can at least clean the roof off........We will see.

Random thoughts

So I really try not to say the word hate. But I really dislike my co-worker. I won't name names. She's young and she's for lack of a better word, a punk. She's very unprofessional and negative. Her negativity rubbs off on me. I used to have trouble with saying too much in the past and now I find that I just want to blah blah blah about her to any and everyone who will listen. So somehow I gotta find a way to quit that.

Colors. My colors aren't doing what I want them to. I needed pink the other day and it just slipped right out of the hair.:( So I added purple hoping it would stay. Oh it stayed alright. Purple.:( So I hope that my co-workers negativity goes away real sooooooon. Cause I don't know how much more of her I can stand!

Great day

Last night I had a WONDERFUL time with my husband and niece watching the last UT/A&M game. Even though we lost it was a close and great game!

Today my niece helped do so much. We organized my hole house and then we put up all my Christmas decorations. My house looks so good! My laundry is done and put up!:) My kids are tucked away in their beds! I am sad now cause I'liea will have to go home in the morning. I will get to see her more often though.:)

I am grateful that my husband and I are doing well. Does something good for my soul.

Black Friday

So. I don't do black friday. Never have. Never will. My mother has my children. I am going to enjoy a cup of coffee and clean my house and then it's my friday to go and do what I want. And guess what? I want to spend it with my son. I may go and get him and we will go find a park! I got good sleep last night. Still miss my husband though. I am in a ok mood right now so I am going to get everything done.

Mom's House

Well the hubs and I are home getting ready for the last A&M/ UT game. Very bitter sweet. I have had a long road to becoming an Aggie. I was originally a longhorn. When I was 22 I wasn't doing anything with myself and I was in a relationship that was a huge roller coaster. So I followed my friend Hayley to CS. I had the time of my life. Made some friends and good memories. I was there the year the bon fire fell.:( So I hope tonight it's a fun, fair game. I lived in austin so technically I am for both teams. May the team who are in it to win it, WIN!

Earlier today at moms it was actually bareable. Nothing to complain about. I love my mothers food. And for the first year in about TEN years it was only family.:) I'Liea is going to watch the game with us. Right now I am doing alright and I am thankful for what I have.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving

Well I woke up refreshed. So glad. My daughter slept with me. I love waking up to her smiling face. She also loves to give me kisses. Too cool. I think I figured out why I hate mornings. Because Brandon isn't here. I miss him terribly. I hope I don't eat too much today and I hope everyone likes the healthier cooking that I did. I thank God for what I have.

I have no earthly idea

I sometimes have so much going through my head that I don't know if it's voices or I'm just crazy. lol. I thought maybe if I "wrote" it down I could get what ever is bothering me to go away. I may have a great day sometimes and sometimes I might get on here and sound a little weird. I don't know if anyone will ever read this. It's kind of like an open journal. My parents read mine growing up so technically I have no secrets. So, if you do decide to get on here and read and I say something you don't like, I am sorry. I am at a point in my life where I am trying to be here for me. I am always trying to do for someone else and now I would like to do what I feel is right. Lately I have been going to church and I LOVE IT! I have been scared to share that with some people for fear of being called a hypocrite. But I have really connected with my sunday school class. I recently went and did a bible study with the homeless. I am trying to "find myself" for lack of a better phrase. I don't want to be a saint or perfect. I just want to do what I can so my kids will have respect for themselves and others. Well that's all on the mind tonight. I am going through a lot so I will save the dark blogs for another day.

P.s. I have been missing my grandmother as of late. She died 17 years ago. I wonder what it means...............